I never knew it would come to this.

So really, I'm so, so, so sorry. To everyone.

In cases like these, it is common that they people involved eventually all go back to normal, learn from their mistakes, live happily ever after and become closer than ever.

This time, I'm not too sure. Why? Why does life have to be so complicated?

I've been speaking in.. codes nowadays, cos I don't wanna hurt anyone's feelings. But you know what? Why don't I stop being a hypocrite and instead start saying what I feel? Why don't I speak up and speak my mind for once and stop acting like a freaking subservient chicken and also stop being a people-pleaser and stop doing what I know people what me to do? Yeah, why don't I.

So here goes.

(I do not take any sides, but I assume that everyone (especially Jac) is gonna hate me after this and think that I am a total **t** ...)

Jac, it totally pains me that I can no longer say what I want in front of you, cos I'm afraid that I'll hurt your feelings.
It also totally pains me that you don't ever wanna speak to Ziyad again. It's just... don't you think that it's a little harsh? I mean, I know you were seriously pissed when that guy (his name is Wisnuh, by the way) kept saying stuff about you. And the fact that Ziyad is the one who brought him there doesn't help either. But when you look back at it, Ziyad didn't really do anything wrong... I mean, I don't think he knew that his friend would be such an ass (no offence). So yeah... And Ziyad, when you apologized to Jac after the whole thing, before we went home, I think it wasn't quite enough....

Ziyad, it totally sucks that you're getting blamed for it. And I can see that you are totally sincere.. So all I can say is I'm sorry that you feel sorry for making me feel bad. Does that make sense?

Pat, I don't really have much to say, sadly ... But thank you. You know, for being there. And helping to tell Zb about the post.

To everyone else who is not involved but has somehow read this far in the post, hate me. I don't care already.

To God, please, give me some guidance. I hate to meddle in other people's business, but I can't just stand there and watch all this drama (which is quite unbecoming for four 13-year olds, don't you think?) unfold in front of me.

Peace out.

P.S: If I were a by-stander, I'd say something along the lines of 'Aiyoh so emo ah? Hello you only 13 year old already say stuff like this..' And then shake my head and proceed to say 'The generation nowadays...tsk tsk tsk.'

If I were my usual, non-emo self, I would probably say something like 'Would you guys please lighten up? WHat's with the tense atmosphere? We're all friends, aren't we? Come on, kiss and make up.'

I'm meddling in other people's businesses again, aren't I?

No but seriously, lemme ask the two of you. Are you seriously willing to let something as minute as Ziyad's friend's comments get in the way of your friendship? Which, let me remind you, is a very strong one? Which I helped with (sort of)? So pretty please? Preeeeettyy please consider kissing and making up? K, maybe not the kissing part. (:

When will the time come that I will be able to make him/her laugh again?
When will the time come that I will be able to organize outings that involve the two of them?
When will the time come that we will be closer than ever?
When?
.

P.S: Actually ah I think they're both okay with it already. Just that they need to cool down first before things can go back to normal (hopefully). Let things simmer down a bit, yeah?

Peace out.